I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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