I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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