were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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