THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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