Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Randomize
