i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
