Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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