Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
