I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
