Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Randomize
