It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I think people are normalizing furries
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize