Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
