We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize