remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Randomize
