This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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