Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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