He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Randomize
