Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
When are your genitals available?
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
