just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
