New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
She announced her abortion via fbk
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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