It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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