Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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