no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
