ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Randomize
