Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
