they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
