Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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