yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize