I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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