i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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