fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Is Oprah even human
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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