i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Randomize
