Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
The Most Iconic Met Gala Looks The Kardashian’s Have Rocked
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
25 Hilarious ‘Sex Clubs’ You Should Try To Join
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?