We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize