I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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