It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
