Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
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