I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
MIDGETS
????
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
