Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
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