Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
