She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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