he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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