And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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