she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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