Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
