His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
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