How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize