i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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