I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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