batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
